The famous columnist, Sidney Harris and his friend were buying newspapers from a newsvendor. His friend thanked him politely but instead received a cold face in return.
"This guy's attitude is really bad, isn't he?", Harries said while they moved on.
"Every time he is like this.", answered his friend.
"Then why are you so nice to him?", asked Harries.
"Why should I let him determine my behavior?"
A mature person holds his/her own key of happiness. He/she does not expect other people to make him happy, instead he/she can bring happiness to others.
Every person has a 'key of happiness' in his/her heart, but we always let other people to take control of it.
A woman grumbles,"I'm not happy, because my husband always travels leaving me alone at home."
She puts the key of happiness into her husband's hand.
A mother says,"My children won't listen to me, this makes me mad!"
She puts the key of happiness into the hands of her children.
A man might say,"My boss does not appreciate me, therefore I'm not in a good mood."
He puts the key of happiness into his boss's hand.
A young man comes out of the stationery shop and says,"The service of the cashier is really poor, I'm really hot!"
These people make the same decision, that is, letting others to control their mood.
When we let other people to take control of our mood, we feel that we are the victims, that there is nothing that we can do, grumble and anger become our only alternative.
We start to blame people and feel that they are responsible for our misery. At this time we put the responsibility to the people around us, that they should make us happy.
It seems there is no way to control ourselves other than letting others to control us. No one would like to go near us, they even avoid us.
When a mature person holds his/her own key of happiness, he/she can bring happiness to others. If his/her mood is stable, it is then a pleasure and not a pressure to be with such people.
Where is your key of happiness? Is it inside the hand of others? Get it back fast!
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
Be an Ever Growing Apple Tree
An apple tree finally bears fruit.
The first year, it bore 10 apples. Nine were taken away and only one was left on the tree. The apple tree was very angry and it refused to grow anymore.
The second year, it bore 5 apples, 4 were taken away and only one was left on the tree.
"Ha! Ha! Last year I got 10% of the fruits, this year 20%. That means double!", the apple tree felt much better this time.
But the apple tree should think it this way : continue to grow. If it can bear 100 apples with 90 being taken away, it can get 10 apples for itself. Possibly 99 apples being taken away with 1 left for itself. But never mind, it can still continue to grow, with the third year bearing 1,000 apples.
Most important is that the tree is still growing. When it has grown into a huge tree, it can ignore those factors which at one time stopped its growth.
Really, do not bother with the fruits. What matters most is :Growth.
Are you an employee who stops learning when you encounter some hindrance? For example, when you first started working, you were talented and you had contributed tremendously to your department or the whole company. But nobody took notice of it or perhaps you had received compliments verbally but no actual rewards.
You just feel that you are like the apple tree. You only enjoy a tiny portion of the fruits. So, you are angry and resentful. Finally you decide not to work hard, to comply with the saying that "to give peanuts and you get monkeys".
After a few years, you find that you have lost the passion for work. You will think that age has caught up. But actually you have stopped growing. Remember if you are an employee working in a badly managed company or under an unreasonable superior, never give up growing because one day when you are strong, these factors cannot hinder you anymore.
The first year, it bore 10 apples. Nine were taken away and only one was left on the tree. The apple tree was very angry and it refused to grow anymore.
The second year, it bore 5 apples, 4 were taken away and only one was left on the tree.
"Ha! Ha! Last year I got 10% of the fruits, this year 20%. That means double!", the apple tree felt much better this time.
But the apple tree should think it this way : continue to grow. If it can bear 100 apples with 90 being taken away, it can get 10 apples for itself. Possibly 99 apples being taken away with 1 left for itself. But never mind, it can still continue to grow, with the third year bearing 1,000 apples.
Most important is that the tree is still growing. When it has grown into a huge tree, it can ignore those factors which at one time stopped its growth.
Really, do not bother with the fruits. What matters most is :Growth.
Are you an employee who stops learning when you encounter some hindrance? For example, when you first started working, you were talented and you had contributed tremendously to your department or the whole company. But nobody took notice of it or perhaps you had received compliments verbally but no actual rewards.
You just feel that you are like the apple tree. You only enjoy a tiny portion of the fruits. So, you are angry and resentful. Finally you decide not to work hard, to comply with the saying that "to give peanuts and you get monkeys".
After a few years, you find that you have lost the passion for work. You will think that age has caught up. But actually you have stopped growing. Remember if you are an employee working in a badly managed company or under an unreasonable superior, never give up growing because one day when you are strong, these factors cannot hinder you anymore.
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